Wednesday, October 30, 2013

In my face! Prayers answered

School starts up again tomorrow, second session. New students have arrived, we all ate tacos together Friday night and I have a small opportunity to learn about them. How the tables we put together it was a giant banquet table, so I couldn't talk with everyone, but it was a nice gathering. 

While praying over this new session I am praying for new. Not expecting old things to repeat themselves but see what God has for me this time around. Also I am praying that we, as Christ followers and the body together, can build one another up when things get tough and when we need encouragement. Praying that it will actually be normal for us all to stop, if needed, to take the time to pray for each other. And I am excited to see how we will grow in learning the Spanish Language and grow in our relationships with the people in town. 

I wrote this ^^^ Oct 27, 2013 and today was our second day of classes and God answered some prayers within the first 2 days! 
- New, praying for the old things to not being repeated necessarily...well so simple but the fist day of class I found out my classmates were not the same 6 people that I loved learning with. At first I did not see the new set up as a great thing, but now I realized it was an answer to prayers. There are only 3 of us in our class now, one man that took level one 3 years ago and is now continuing level 2. It will not be the same but I now am looking forward to what we will bring each other and what God wants to do with us. ALSO!!! What I am stoked about... one of my classmates Arie said we should pray for all that we are learning and trying to memorize. I just about jumped out of my seat... maybe I did. I said yes I think that is a great idea. He said we could even come like 5 minutes before school and pray over it all. So I wrote down 3 prayers that we are now praying and I tapped them to our classroom wall to remember. We will be putting up anything we need prayer for or want to pray for... 
so that was quick! 

We have a lot a lot a lot of memorizing to do and well I have a very difficult time memorizing. Not so fun, but it is all worth it. 
Praise God who knows

Friday, October 25, 2013

handshandshandshands yay!

From my journal October 19

This week I had the opportunity to communicate with two Deaf women from this small small pueblo... who would of known!
Up until this week i've only heard about them or seen them while walking by but never had the opportunity to say a thing. On Thursday while sitting at our 3 o'clock meal at school someone pointed out to me the woman selling pastries + that she is one of the women in town that cannot hear. I watched as people came up to her to buy the food. It was obvious she was not signing a "language" but using what she knew to be able to communicate, her made up signs and other peoples gestures.  It got the job done, both parties were not clearly understood but they each got what they wanted/needed.  The woman looks to be in her 40s + very friendly, which is a pleasant surprise. When she interacted with each customer her face was always a smile. I was still sitting at my table watching it all happen while people around were talking to one another. At this point I had stopped eating + was totally sitting watching her... I noticed no one was buying from her right then. I prayed "Lord you've brought me here, use me how YOU want. Use my hands to communicate Your love." Then I stood up + walked over to her. She gave me the strangest look, pointed to her ear as to tell me she was Deaf + she thought I was trying to speak verbally with her. I was trying to talk with her but not the way she expected. After some time of me trying to talk to her another man standing by who knew her helped us a bit, he knew her "home sign" + could communicate better (which I think is so interesting, she understands better what she has used to for so long but not at all affective). When she realized that I wanted to communicate with her with our hands + not our mouths, she lit up and told me her name sign and finger spelled her name N E L S E Y. I told her my name + name sign. Nesly said a few other things then that was it, until next time!

Friday night after our Bible study some of us kids went to get a bit to eat + the other young woman who is Deaf was there ordering food! While we were leaving and praying for the food I tried to talk with her. Let me tell you it is VERY difficult to communicate " I want to talk with you , get to know you, I know something that you would love to have/know and I would love to teach it to you". Instead all it seems from her perspective is -some chick is trying to talk to me but cant, obviously it will not work I am deaf, what does she want- It was a look of confusion on her face. Luckily, the other woman could communicate (like the other man helping Nelsy) to her in her gestures.  The friend communicated that I sign, I teach kids, + I want to teach her. The young woman who is Deaf, her face transformed to more vulnerable, friendly, smiling and ended up telling us where she lived (not in the same pueblo but close enough). Some time I would love to go to her house to talk to her parents and get to know them all.

I am hoping to know each of the women a whole lot better + teach them a new language, another world that will open opportunities to communicate in bigger cities with other Deaf people of Mexico. I am praying for more opportunities + praying for His Presence with me in every step. He gives all that I need to do this + exactly the right things to say.

Let's get violent

I am not too great at informing you about "Language School" but when I think I know what I am going to write to you all God shows me something else. So here it is again... not anything about the Spanish learning but spiritually what I am learning + wrestling with.

My walk right now with God is best explained with a quote from Dana Candler writing in The Rewards of Fasting + quotes from the Bible of course. Dana writes it perfectly... how everything is being worked out inside, how I am feeling with Jesus + how I am doing right now. 

 Hungering For All That God Will Give Us.
     "I remember several years ago when the Lord really began convicting my heart of how little hunger I had for God."( -First of all boom, yes this is exactly what He is doing for me, so sweet of Him.-)
And she continues: "He opened my understanding to how much He truly wanted to give me + showed me the gap between that fullness + my actual experience. He began to purposely disrupt my life by revealing to me the principle that He gives more of Himself in accordance with my hunger for more.  Until my capacity to receive from Him was enlarged by spiritual hunger, I would be limited in my experience of God."
     "Though I'd known Jesus my whole life, I had never considered that I lacked this inward hunger. My heart was very small in its capacity, but I did not know it. I thought I loved God intensely, but He revealed to me that, in truth, my thirst for Him was small compared with what it could be. This exposure was truly a gift."
     " At that time I entered into what I now call 'the longing to long' or 'the hungering to hunger.' I was in the tension between sincerely wanting to want God + not yet being overcome by hunger for Him; + this is exactly where God wanted me. Hunger begets hunger + in time, He caused my initial desire to develop into strong desire, + then He answered me with more of Himself, just as He loves to do"
 Jesus said, "Blessed are those who hunger + thirst for righteousness for they shall be filled."

 Jeremiah prophesied about genuine spiritual hunger when the Lord spoke these words through him, "You will call upon me + go + pray to me, + I will listen to you. + you will seek Me + find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart. I will be found by you, says the Lord." (Jer 29:12-14) God promised that He will be found when He is pursued by anyone with a genuinely hungry heart. 

I love what Dana says next: 
"Just saying prayers is not what God requires. Spiritual language + grandiose statements in prayer do not impress God He peers right into the depths of the human heart + sees our spiritual void + barrenness. He is after something far deeper than regular attendance at prayer meetings. He wants to actually possess us. He wants our lives to be governed + ruled by our yearning for Him... in His grace the Lord is making us a people who cannot live without His blessing."

This is all so nice + sounds great, but my flesh wants the exact opposite + it is a constant struggle. I constantly am giving Him all I am, my weaknesses and walking in His strength because I cannot do it. I want to fight, we have to fight. Jesus opened the door for all to enter the deep things of the Spirit (1 cor 2:10) by His death, resurrection + giving of Holy Spirit to the hearts of men (Heb 10:19-22). This is a massive change, gift, + invitation! I know that He wants us to fight for His Kingdom, even requires spiritual violence in our pursuit of God. God is leading + teaching me to follow Him without compromise. I am praying for this in my life. We can only by Jesus, in His Presence. 

Love these words:
"Hasten now, O loving Lord to us
We’re thirsty
Fill these souls, Spirit, every hour
We need Thee

Come, come Holy One
Come meet us
All, all for Your glory
Lord Jesus
Lead us on, the perfect path O Lord
And may we sin no more
This spotless bride, the Church
Is Yours
I am Yours
Only Yours
We are Yours
Only Yours"

Friday, October 18, 2013

I attended my first funeral today

Journal entry 
15 October, 2013 

And the whole time all around me, all I noticed was life. The man who passed away was the father of a woman whose family is involved with the church + base. Two of the Spanish School students live with the family. I hear that the man was a believer in Jesus as his Lord + Savior, the Way… so really it was a celebration. It was a celebration of a soul that is now forever + always praising in heaven, healthy, + united with our Bridegroom, Jesus.

My family + I arrived a few minutes after 5pm at the building where the church, friends + family all was. The crowd standing around seemed like ½ the town of Cacalote. People were inside + outside the building watching + listening. When my family + I arrived two men were playing their guitars + singing with the crowd clapping along to the beat. The family of the man was standing around the casket. There were no chairs only standing room + people were only along the walls of the building not in the middle of the room. About 20-25 minutes later after some church leaders spoke, encouraged, + prayed we all hoped into different cars, trucks, + vans headed to the beach. (Here in Cacalote normally instead of cars, the people walk the way to the beach with the casket but because of the river being full we all drove.) It is a big thing here, everyone comes to support… family, friends, acquaintances, + random folks (me) join in to be with the family. Here the more rural area, the people do not wear black clothing for funerals.

Our car/taxi was the 3rd to arrive out of about 15 or more cars with loads of people. We hopped out + flooded to the grave. The graveyard is right on the beach about a 30 second walk east from the sand + the waves. The pastor, ministry leaders, and 'a family member or two spoke but it all took time, nothing was rushed. Cathy (my aunt here) + I stood in the back with our backs facing the crashing waves. Standing in the back with everyone in front of and all around me that was when I noticed all of the life that surrounded me. More specifically little humans/babies! This man who passed lived a life + now I was seeing new lives with a few weeks’ olds + a few months old + a few years old. Brand spankin new to this world. Life is a crazy thing, a wild thing + a precious thing. Like a baby my eyes, ears, nose, hands, + mouth cannot take in enough.  I take for granted these senses God has given me + trusted me with. I want to take in life + learn to live, as Heaven holds me. 

Some of the babies

This woman is Cathy (my Oaxacan aunt/hair stylist)
The little girl behind the baby is my "fonetica"teachers daughter

our view from the back


Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Tututapec photos

the church (creepy on the inside)

Irma, one of our amazing teachers here

Saturday, October 12, 2013

You call me + I come running

Tuesday Oct 7

Last night once again I went to the weekly devotional on the Roca Blanca Base. The man leading worship started singing out the heart song, the same heart song we are all crying out. We kept on singing out around His holiness, glory, + honor. Part of the time was only instrumental which I enjoy because then I am able to sing out all that God puts on my heart, able to pour out all that is inside straight to Him... in English, Spanish, or Sign Language. The leader was talking about decisions by faith + we sang out "I will go" + after he asked for people to come up if they wanted prayer as they say to God "I will go". During this time people were continuing in worship + the band was jamming. At the time he first said it I did not fully understand what he was saying and so I asked my friend Pamela + she shared with me what was going on... + I stood there for about 3 seconds and thought "well I want to say that again, I want to make that proclamation once again and show Him/tell Him my love for Him." So I made walked up to the front and this joy, inexpressible joy came over me and laughter. The leader went around one by one to each person asking for prayer. Once he arrived to me he put his hands on my head + prayed out loud. I prayed along with him out loud my own prayers + at one point I felt Holy Spirit in me say "let it out" + an out cry came but like a release of I dont know what... at the same time that I started to express this cry the man also praying gave out the same out cry. It was like our voices raised but not screams. No words just voice. Then he started speaking in tongues over me. At the same time one of the founders of Roca Blanca Sue put her hands on the back of my head. After this happened we kept on worshiping. Sue, who doesn't know me or anything about me, hugged me + said "I dont know where your going, but your going."

I feel this is true for all of us that are here, in this sort time, we are sent. We are called + going for His name + for His glory.  I dont know exactly what God has next for me, but whatever it is, it is good because He is good!

Saturday, October 5, 2013

Here in Cacalotepec, where Monday-Friday I go to Spanish School on the base, there is a Bible School and a Music School Mission Base. Check it out!
The Spanish students also get the opportunity to communicate with all of the students on the base through out the week. A new bunch of (Bible) students will be coming in December for another year of learning. Yesterday I got to meet up with my friend, from the Bible School, Pamela. Her and I both desire to pray and so we did! Yesterday we went to the prayer room on the base with our worship music and praised Jesus our Bridegroom, praying for the youth, and for our families. We read Ezekiel 37:1-14 and just stayed in His Presence giving God His glory.

Lately God has been teaching me eternity... Setting my mind on things above and with that also a lot about Biblical fasting and how much they go together. How it is a part of normal Christian life... Matthew 6:16 Jesus said "When you fast" (not if you fast) it is meant to occur in the normal course of any disciple's life. He is teaching me that this is our glory. It is our glory to say "no" to the fleeting earthly pleasures that surround us in the here and now. God has given us an opportunity to choose Him on this side of eternity, above all lesser things. Fasting is more than denying ourselves food. My friend Pamela gave me a book all about fasting called The rewards of fasting and I highly recommend it!

School life
There are two more weeks of class for this session and then some folks are leaving and some of us are staying for the next few levels. 
Yesterday we went on a field trip to the former capital of the Mixtec Empire (from 800 to 1522)-Tututepec. We toured a museum and a Catholic temple then walked down a long street into the neighborhood where there was a fiesta! I would say we crashed their party. We did not know them and they definitely did not know us. Some of us ladies even danced with the local women of the party/gathering. They had live music and lots of food! While leaving they tried to stop us to stay and eat with them... we could not stay and said our goodbyes and took off back to Cacalotepec.

We are still without internet on the base but this is working out just fine here in Rio Grande.  These days without internet are refreshing for me, I am able to spend time with the people and get to know my host family. Yesterday I ran with Cathy my "aunt" along the beach road and around a big grassy lawn. She is the one person I have gotten to know the best so far, she loves to give me fun hair dos.

Well that is all for now... pretty random stuff. God is great and comforting every single step. He shows me what I need to do in the moment and is preparing me for things to come!

Keep sweet!

Tuesday, October 1, 2013


Our breakfast before the beach... a few of the spanish school students

this is where we surfed/learned to surf

ready for lessons

Here are two members of the family that lives next door. The baby is Jaden.

HEALING.... I was not going to post a photo while having the infection. Here is one after